florida jewish homeland miami beach

I'm Jewish and I like Israel, but I don't think it's the only option for a homeland

Everyone knows the real homeland of the Jews is

Miami Beach

I'm Jewish and I'm a big proponent of moving to the land of our people

Miami Beach, where you can see a beautiful woman with a BBL, a muscular Cuban man who will share his cocaine, and a retired Jewish couple all on line at the CVS

I want to go to Miami because the Cubans have everything a Jew can want: women, food… cocaine

Some of us even live in Boca, Tampa, Orlando, and for some reason, Jacksonville.

I think it's weird that so many Jews live in Florida, because that means that maybe some of those Florida man headlines… are about Jews?

So I've been looking through the Florida man headlines trying to figure out which ones are Jewish:

- "Florida Man Gets Beat up by the Easter Bunny" — Jewish man gets beat up by the Easter Bunny. That one makes sense - "Florida man arrested for allegedly throwing a live alligator into Wendy's drive-thru window" — I want this one to be Jewish. We could use the street cred